Mental Health Matters
Coaching Tip # 60
Goals and commitment go hand in hand.
If you want to get better at something, then you must commit to a schedule of practice that cultivates and then advances that skill forward. When you combine that with other skills that you are also continuously working on, this will move you toward your goals. And when you hit an obstacle or struggle with stick-to-it-ness, there are many slogans readily at hand to inspire and push you forward. These words part of our vocabulary.
Just do it
Some want it to happen; Some wish it would happen; Others make it happen
Play like a champion today
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard
Practice winning every day
All things are difficult before they are easy
Championships are won at practice
There is no finish line
If these slogans resonate with you, you are not alone.
I was recently working with a group of young athletes and I asked them to share what commitment meant to them. All the answers focused on a form of physical exertion and overcoming adversity. They too, had learned a version of these expressions.
Hard work
Focus on the little things
Show up on time
Learn from failure
Don’t skip practice
Be all in
These phrases are a part of a being committed to anything. But we also need to teach our young athletes that their body is more than a machine. We are human beings not just human doings. If all they ever learn is to push, push, push, there will come a time when they can no longer push, yet they know nothing else and have not developed the skills to deal with the state they find themselves in.
It starts with the adults in the room. We need to show it is safe to talk about our whole well-being not just our physical well-being.
Make a commitment to regularly check in on your mental health. If you are struggling, try one of these strategies.
When you run up against a struggle with your built-in trained bias to push through it - you probably find yourself asking “What is wrong with me? Why can’t I find the motivation? Why don’t I have any energy?” Instead ask yourself “What is happening to me? What do I need right now?” This moves you away from blame toward facts. When you have the facts, you can start to problem solve.
Be realistic about ‘best’. I know that you naturally try your best every day. It is part of who you are. But when you are fighting an unfamiliar feeling of stress or anxiety, the brain goes into a protection mode. Instead of measuring against a prior best, pause and ask yourself “What would be a reasonable expectation today? What would I consider a mini win today?”
Find a safe confidant. You are not alone. If you tore a muscle and kept using it without getting treatment, you have been educated to know that will create long term consequences. Yet we are told to push through our times of mental health struggle. Because we cannot see the pain, we might not validate the pain. It is still there. If not acknowledged the consequences of it will arise someplace else. When things are going right, it is a good time to open the conversation with someone you trust. That way, when things are not going to plan, you know you have a secure place to share.