Exemplars
Coaching Tip #27
Who are the exemplars in your life?
For me, an exemplar is someone who serves as an example of character, action, and compassion, who is open to listening and learning. An exemplar is someone who accepts that life is a journey of experiences, teaching us perspectives along the way.
My dad, Thomas Brayley Copp, was an exemplar.
This week marks the 8th anniversary of his passing.
When I was a young parent, I remember my dad saying to me:
Melinda, you have created another branch to the family tree. Be an exemplar of those values you believe in. Always be willing to learn, and never get stuck on being right. This will create deep roots that will anchor all of you. You will make mistakes; your kids will make mistakes. Mistakes are not bad. They may challenge you, but with strong roots you will weather the storms. Years will pass and the roots will deepen. Believe in your kids, so that even when they stray they will find their way back to those values.
When my dad died, 8 of his 9 grandchildren stood up at the funeral and spoke of the foundation of values that their papa had instilled in them. The 9th grandchild, Mac, was away competing in a major rowing race in England, following a dream. It is exactly where Papa would have wanted him to be.
From youngest to oldest – here are snippets of their words.
I will take the lifelong lessons he taught me and apply them to every situation: never give up and don’t look back, and enjoy every day like it is a gift.
In many ways, Papa, you are not gone, and will live inside of me always as an inspiration.
Papa was always trying to make everything better so that we could enjoy each other’s company that much more. In the end everything he did was in order to enhance the experiences of those around it.
While he had numerous achievements both in business and around the community, perhaps his biggest achievement was always being there, and building our family.
At the very center of our family was my grandfather. In so many ways he has brought us together, whether it was weekend bonfires at the cottage or Sunday night roast beef dinners.
His tireless personal energy and immense kindness will continue to inspire me throughout my life, and will be a standard I try to reach.
I see my papa in counsel with his children and their spouses. He would give a quiet word of advice, a witty joke to lift their mood, a bear hug – this would lift up, help them to find the answer themselves and leave them feeling better. I know what it is to see true wisdom in action.
Thanks to him, I have my priorities straight, with family always being the most important. My papa has shown me that we can be both successful business people and have an amazing family life. He understood what it was to have a work / life balance and I hope that someday … I will too.
My dad lives on. I see it in his grandchildren.
I challenge each of us to reflect upon the following three questions:
What does the word exemplar mean to you?
Who is one exemplar in your life?
What roots have they created and how are you carrying that legacy onward?
Happy Father’s Day, dad.
Melinda