How Wins Reverberate
Coaching Tip #33
Accomplishments feel great. When we achieve something that we have set our mind to, there are many positive cascading effects: it may be a psychological or physiological boost, as feel-good endorphins are released; it may increase your motivation and cause you to put in a deeper effort toward a larger goal; it may open up a door for you that was previously closed. Wins are important. They create momentum
In my coaching practice I have all my clients track their daily wins. Examples can range from simple actions to things that require an immense amount of effort: finding the time to exercise, closing an important deal, overcoming a failure, or doing something that is outside of your comfort zone. It’s not important what it is, it matters that you recognize it. This helps change our internal language from what went wrong today, to what went right.
But there is also another way to frame your wins. Try looking at the bigger picture.
Most of us do not live on an island by ourselves. Your world intersects with many other worlds, some that are important to you, and others that you might only think of in passing. Your actions and your accomplishments influence and affect others. In my book Personal Next I refer to this as being tuned in. It is one of the 9 practices of a high performer. I define it as “a sensitivity to relationships, the environment, and contributing to something bigger than yourself.”
Here is a challenge for the week.
Instead of thinking about how your wins help you, I want you to think about and journal how your wins are benefitting others. Here are some examples:
I worked out or maintained healthy eating habits – by taking care of my body I am able to fully participate in the relationships that are important to me. I am honoring the love I have for others.
Closing a deal – by closing this deal and I am able to take a breather and spend some quality time being present with others. Or, by closing this deal I helped our team secure business for the next 6 months and provided a level of security for our employees.
Overcoming a failure – by sharing with someone else my situation, not only how I coped with failing, but my feelings around failure, I can provide the vulnerability for that person to feel safe and open up about their feelings around failure.
Doing something outside my comfort zone – by stepping out on the dance floor I challenged my self-consciousness, but what I really noticed was how it made my partner happy.
I hope you take up this challenge.
I would love to hear how you shifted your thoughts around your wins toward others and what you noticed. If you want to learn more about why this is important, here is a great article summarizing some of the research on this.
Have a great one.
Melinda